Concrete Angel
by WonderWorks82
Summary: Sonny Munroe. The image of perfect. Or so everyone thinks. What happens when you look deeper, and you realize that underneath all that makeup and smiles, there's a whole other person hidden away.
1. Concrete Angel

**I do not own Sonny With A Chance even though I really wish I did because that would be so cool. So this is my new story, hope you like it! The song is Concrete Angel by Martina Mcbride. Enjoy!**

_**She walks to school with the lunch she packed  
Nobody knows what she's holdin' back  
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday  
She hides the bruises with linen and lace **_

"No! How dare you!" screams her mother yells, her palm striking again, bound to leave a mark. She doesn't argue with her mother, she knew better. Her father stood in the doorway, watching, hia face a mask. He never stopped her mother from hurting her. She doesn't cry, she doesn't make a sound, and just waits for it to be over.

When her mother finally leaves her, shivering in her own blood on the floor, is only when she allows herself to cry. Only then, for a short while does she cry, before pretending to be someone else again. Only then, does she be herself.

_**The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask  
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask  
Bearing the burden of a secret storm **_

Sonny opened her eyes to the blinding sunlight. She hopped out of bed, and dressed quickly, making sure to wear something long to cover the bruises. She covers her face with makeup, her hair black to hide the blood stains that mark her scalp better. She looks at herself, and sighed. She was OK, she knew that. She was going to be fine.

At the studio, Sonny began her acting. Chad Dylan Cooper may be the best actor of their generation, but if they knew what Sonny was hiding, they would change their mind. No one suspected anyhting like this to happen to Sonny Munroe. She was the happy girl, the perfect girl.

She entered the dressing room she shared with Tawni Hart, and she grinned her normal smile at Tawni, and plopped down on the velvet couch in the back of the room. Tawni sat at the mirror, doing her makeup.

"Your almost late Sonny," Tawni noted, sounding slightly curious. Sonny sighed. She had more bruises to cover this morning.  
"Oh yeah, silly me. I kept leaving, but I kept forgetting things at home," she replied, crossing her legs, and trying not to wince at the movement. Tawni nodded, obviously not really caring. Sonny sighed to herself, and leaned backwards into the couch. Her eyes closed, and she imagined herself, far away from here, from her mother. She imagined herself as a bird, flying over the mountains, leaving Condor Studios behind. She smiled to herself,wanting the thought to be true so bad it killed her.

_**Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel**_

Sonny's eyes popped open, and she focused on Chad, who leaned against the doorway, smirking at them. Sonny looked at him, and suddenly she felt angry. Why did Chad Dylan Cooper, of all people, get such a perfect life, when her, nice Sonny, get beaten by her own mother?

She jumped to her feet, hoping that if she stayed moving, that she wouldn't snap at Chad.

"Hi Chip," murmured Tawni, leaning forward to apply eyeliner. Chad glanced at her, before looking back at Sonny.

"Whats up Sonshine?" he asked. Sonny turned her back to him, rifling through the papers on her desk.

"Nothing Chad. Just have a lot of paperwork to do," she replied, sitting down. She heard him sigh, and heard his feet shuffle away. She took a shuddering breath, and leaned forward, cradling her head in her hands.

"You OK?" she heard Tawni ask. Sonny smiled slightly. Of course, now Tawni cares about her.  
"I'm fine, don't worry. We should get to practice," Sonny said, smiling brightly at Tawni. They headed out to Studio 3, where the rest of the cast was, so they could work on a new sketch, that they had decided on when Sonny was out "sick." That was just the day that the bruises were too bad to cover, and it had taken all her effort to convince Chad not to visit, not while her mom was smoking pot in the other room, still sitting in her endless rage, and her father was at work, unable, and unwilling to make it stop.

_**Somebody cries in the middle of the night  
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights  
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate  
When morning comes it'll be too late **_

After the scene, which turned out to be another Check It Out sketch, Sonny headed to the cafeteria. She needed food, not caring whether it was the gross slop they were served. She got exactly that, and sat at their regular table, picking at it. She took a spoonful, but wanted to vomit the second it touched her tongue. She ate it anyways, because she hadn't eaten once over the whole weekend, locked in her room. The Mackenzie Falls people came in, some snickering at Sonny for eating the gross food. They got lobsters, of course.

Sonny glared at them, envious of their perfect lives. People thought that she was perfect, but oh was she far from it. She looked down at her stomach, lifting the shirt just an inch, to reveal a black bruise so blue that it looked like the ocean. She felt tears sting her eyes, and she yanked the shirt down, hiding the evidence of her life.

She was used to being hit, though. She had been hit since she was six years old. She remebered the first days, where she was so confused about it, and she remembered hating her dad for not stopping it. But now she didn't blame him. Her mother had the rage of fifty bears attacking. He couldn't stop her, not even if he tried. And if he did try, she would turn on him too. She loved her dad, and knew he loved her too, even if he didn't show it.

"Sonny, what did you think of the sketch? We never got your feedback, you left so quickly," Nico asked her, sliding in across from her. Sonny looked up, and smiled at him.  
"It was really good. I liked it, a lot," Sonny said honestly, taking another bite of the crap on a stick. Nico glanced at it, and made a face. "I'm hungry," she defended herself, looking down.

He laughed lightly, before telling her that he was going to go back and hang out with Tawni, since they had begun to date, which still freaked out Sonny a little. He left her alone again, and she found herself missing the company. She threw her food away, suddenly sickened by it.

"Sonny, are you OK?" Chad's voice asked, as she plopped back down. She looked up, as he sat across from her. She gave him a weak smile, her body feeling drained. She didn't know why, but lately it had been getting harder and harder to act. Harder to hide what was killing her.

"I'm fine Chad, but thanks," she said, coughing into her hand. "Just have a little cold, that's all."

He smiled back slightly, but didn't leave.

"Hey, I was wondering, my cast and I are going to the beach today, and they were wondering if you wanted to join us. They like you, but they don't like the rest of the Randoms, so... Just you," Chad said, leaning on his elbows. Suddenly a vivid image of the night before filled her head.

"_Mom, can I ask you something," Sonny asked her mother, who looked up from the bottle of vodka. _

"_Sure," her mother sighed, plopping the glass on the table, where some sploshed out, and stained Sonny's dress._

_Sonny leaned forward, her elbows on the table. "Why-" her mothers face suddenly looked mad._

"_Get your elbows off the table."_

"_What?" _

"_NOW!" her mother shouted, her hand whipping out like a flash, and slapping Sonny. Sonny took her arms off the table quickly, touching her cheek softly. _

"_You need to learn to be polite," her mother snapped, grabbing her arm tightly. Her hand squeezed tightly, causing bruises to bloom. Tears came to Sonny's eyes, but she didn't cry. Her mother threw her to the floor. "Are we clear?"_

"_Yes Mom. I'm sorry," Sonny whispered. She had no intention of finishing her story. She never did._

_**Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel**_

"Sonny?" Chad asked, waving a hand in front of her face. Sonny snapped back to present time, and looked at him.

"I can't, sorry," she said, tracing her finger on the table. What she really meant was that she had no bathing suit to cover her bruises, which almost covered every inch of her body. "Dentist appointment."

"Oh, OK. That's cool. See you around Sonny," he said, smiling at her, before heading off with his cast. Some waved to her sweetly. She waved back.

She stared at the wall, before getting up. She had to get home, now. Her mom would be very mad if she was late. She ran the whole way to the dressing room, grabbing her bag. "Bye!" she cried to the pair making out on the couch. She waved to the vent, and to Grady, who was staring at Nico and Tawni with a grossed out expression. She sprinted to her car, and hopped in, tearing out of the parking lot. She had seven minutes. In three minutes she was on the highway. In two she was on her road, In one on her driveway. In another she was in the house. She could hear shouting upstairs, and she closed the door silently, creeping up toward her room.  
"No I will not stop!... She deserves it Will!... How dare you accuse me of that?" she heard a slam, and lunged into her room, just as her mother barged out of her own. She marched into Sonny's room, and punched her face.  
"Your(punch) father just called me(slap) to tell me that(throws to floor) he wants me to stop beating you(kicks) and I told him(kicks again) that I won't," her mother screamed in anger. She picked Sonny up, and carried her out of the room. She threw her down the stairs, and Sonny screamed as her body bounced down.

"I hate you!" her mother screamed at her, before going back into her own room. Sonny lay at the bottom of the stairs, drifting in and out of consciousness. She was vaguely aware of her father coming home, and him lifting her to the bathroom, and placing her in the full tub. She kind of remembered him putting her to bed too. She remebered hearing shouting before she blacked out.

_**A statue stands in a shaded place  
An angel girl with an upturned face  
A name is written on a polished rock  
A broken heart that the world forgot**_

_**Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel**_

**OK! So that was chapter one, but I am not sure if I should continue. Tell me what you think, thanks so much! Review please, I would really like your feedback! Thanks!**


	2. Broken

**Hi guys! Thanks so much for the reviews. You asked, so I guess I'll keep going. I don't own Sonny With A Chance:( Enjoy! I hope... The song for this chapter is Broken, by Seether. **

**_I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away  
I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain_  
**

When she woke up, she could barely move. her muscles ached so much it made her want to cry. She pulled her eyes open, seeing she was in her room. She glanced wearily at the clock. Seven a.m. She groaned. She had to be at work at eight. She forced her body to sit up, and refrained from screaming out in pain.

Her back cracked so loudly and painfully, she thought she might have broken her spine. She wiggled her fingers and toes to make sure, but this wasn't an odd thing. She usually had to do this every morning. She was going to see her brother, Bill, today. Thank God. He knew about her mom, but only because her mom loved him, and didn't hide the abuse from him. He never told, too scared of her himself. She never hit him, though, something Sonny never understood.

"He is a good boy," her mother would say, though all he did was smoke and get drunk all the time.

She stood, her legs so weak that she almost fell immediately back down. She leaned on the bed a moment, and glanced down at her body. Her shirt had ridden up, and she had a glimpse of bruises. Bruises were layered, some yellow and fading, others so light you could only see the outline of them. She had one bruise that covered practically her whole stomach, and it was a nasty purple-black color. She sighed, and yanked the shirt down, wincing at the sudden movement.

She dressed, by putting on a green tank top, and jeans. She put a long sleeve blue top, with just a little cleavage showing, where she wasn't bruised. She looked normal, and thank god it was winter, so she wouldn't look weird.

'_**cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough  
'cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel light when you're gone away**_

She slipped on some half slipper/half flat shoes and headed downstairs. Every step made her want to cry. She prayed her mother wasn't awake yet. Her mother was in the kitchen, as though waiting. She glanced up as Sonny walked in. She crossed over to Sonny in two steps, and smacked her so hard across the face, that Sonny's head collided with her shoulder.

She forgot her make up, and the one bruise that lined her cheek lay on her face, screaming the truth. She slipped out the front door after grabbing her bag from the floor, and hurried up to her car.

She jumped in, and sped to Condor Studios. She didn't look in the mirrors, one mistake that she never made. She always checked.

She felt like crying. Why was her life like this? Why did her mom hit her? She knew it was because she was bad. She knew that somewhere deep down her mother loved her, she just wanted to know where. She also knew that once she was eighteen, in three weeks, she could move out. Then she wouldn't be hit, then she could live her life, and drop the bruises. She could swim with other people, go out, where nicer clothes that don't make her sweat bullets in the winter just because she has to hide the bruise caused from when her mom hit her with a frying pan on the leg.

She quickly wiped the single tear that fell from her empty brown eyes. She wasn't sure how she was going to be able to do work today, and be Sonny Monroe, not Allison. Allison was who she really was, Sonny was just a cover up. Her mother hit her, and threw her down the stairs. Her mother hit her without a reason. Her mother broke the rule. Never hit without purpose. Sonny let another tear fall, and as she wiped it away, she pulled into the parking lot to see Chad standing by his car, listening to music. She parked a ways away from him, but not walking by him was impossible, he was parked in front of the door. He watched her walk over, and as Sonny got closer she saw his smile fade, replaced by horror. Her hand flew to my cheek, and Sonny felt the bruise pulsing angrily. She stopped walking, and took a step back instead, her eyes wide. Chad began his way toward her, dodging cars. Sonny turned on her heel, and began to run. She jumped in between cars, around them, through them, she even climbed inside someones, because she couldnt get around it.

"Sonny!" she heard Chad yell her name, as she ran into the road. Tears rolled down her cheeks. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She has been doing this for years now, why forget today. On Chads birthday. The day she was seeing Bill.

_**The worst is over now and we can breathe again  
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away  
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain**_

"No! I'm fine!" Sonny screamed, her feet slowing. A painful cramp pierced her side, and her sore legs decided not to hold her any longer. On the other side of the road, she collapsed, and brought her knees to her chin. She needed a plan, and one fast. She decided to say while babysitting, she was hit by a soccer ball. That would work, right?

Chad caught up pretty quick, and leaned beside her. His fingers lightly touched her cheek, and she felt a zap at the contact, and immediately leaning away.

"What happened?" he murmured, looking so full of concern and care that Sonny wanted to cry all over again. People were not supposed to cry over her. She was worthless, no one knew better than her mother.

"Babysitting accident," Sonny said, brushing some hair out of her face. His eyes stared at a mark on her forehead, and she tilted her head to let the hair fall back.

"Did your boyfriend hit you Sonny?" she wanted to laugh. Bill, hitting her? No, much closer, she thought bitterly. Instead, she glared at him.  
"Chad, Bill is my brother, he would never hit me, so grow up. I know you don't like him, and we all know you wish he was dead, so-"

He lifted a hand to her lips, silencing her. He gave her a small smile, before helping her up. They began walking to the studios again. He kept glancing at her, as though he wasn't sure she was OK. Of course she wasn't, but did he need to know that?

"Why did you run?" he asked, flexing slightly in the cold morning. Sonny shrugged, looking away.

"You looked like you wanted to hit me, and it scared the shit out of me," she laughed. He stopped.  
"I know your lying. What is going on Sonny? You never swear. Ever," he snapped. She giggled at him, the feeling of acting surging inside her.  
"Chad, I'm fine. Your overreacting," she said, before walking back to the building. After a few seconds he followed.

"Sonny-"

"Drop it OK? I am _fine_. Come on, we are going to be late," she said smiling at him, though inside her heart was breaking. He stormed ahead of her, obviously too angry to even look at her any more. Reality was that he couldn't understand what she wasn't telling him, and what happened to her face. Reality was that he loved her.

_**'cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough  
'cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel right when you're gone away**_

Sonny watched him go, and when he was out of sight, she dropped the smile. She wondered what telling someone would be like, but she knew that was not an option. She could never tell anyone. She hated Chad. Hated him for not understanding. Hated him for his snotty attitude. Hated him for his loving fans. Hated him for his richness. There was a lot to hate him for, but the thing she hated most was the way he made her love her.

She jogged the rest of the way, letting the pain in her body distract her from those thoughts. She didn't want to think about her love for the obnoxious teen star. He didn't that to boost his ego anymore than it already was. She admired him though, the way he was always so collected. Always so... Perfect. Little did she knew he felt the same way about her.

They were two souls, lost in a world of regret, and love. One that Sonny, nor Chad, had really opened themselves up to. And neither seemed close to it.

'_**cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough  
'cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel light when you're gone away **_

**OK so that was this chapter. Was it OK? I tried, haha. So please review, I would really like any feedback you guys have. This was kind of a fill in chapter, as Chad begins to realize that maybe Sonny isn't so perfect. Thanks!**


	3. My Immortal

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews, your all so sweet. This song is "My Immortal" by Evanescence **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Sonny with a Chance, no matter how much it pains me... one day...**

_**I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave  
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone **_

_**These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase **_

Sonny watched the rest of the crew get their costumes on to practice. She wasn't in this sketch, something she was definitely okay with, because she was exhausted, and needed a break. She was sitting in a comfy chair near the door, to watch. She leaned on one side, and slipped in some headphones. "Not Afraid" blared in her ears, and she let herself sink into the music. She remembered once, when she hated rap. She used to be such a prude, too. Hating anyone who swore repeatedly, yet here she was listening to rap. She swore plenty on her own, too.

Her foot tapped along to the music, as she pretended to pay attention to the act. She smiled at appropriate times, which she knew were appropriate when the cast all glanced at her, and she laughed, or smiled, or both, and then they continued, even more exuberant than before.

She heard someone come in behind her, but she didn't pay attention.  
"Hey Sonny," a voice murmured in her ear. She jumped, and my knee jammed the side of the chair.

"Ow! Goddammit!" she shouted. The cast stopped acting, and turned to her, shocked expressions on their faces. She realized her mistake, and whipped her head toward the perpetrator. It was Chad, who looked just as surprised as the rest.

She put a hand on my forehead, a plan forming in my mind.

"Stop screaming and swearing like a girl Chad, it was just a joke. You know how much I hate swearing," she snapped, praying they would believe her. His eyes widened in confusion.  
"What?" he demanded, but she just pushed him out of the way, and stormed down the hall, hearing her cast laughing at "Chad's" voice.

_**When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me  
**_

She began to run, knowing Chad was not far behind. Sure enough she heard his thundering feet as he tried to find her. She whipped around a corner, and threw herself into a storage closet. She closed it as silently as possible, just as he turned into the hallway. She heard him slow, standing right outside the door.

"Sonny?" he called, and she backed up so her back was against the wall. Tears sprung in her eyes. She couldn't do it anymore. She just couldn't. He called her name again, and she slid to her knees, and put her head in her hands. Water rolled out of her eyes.

She heard him leave and sighed. "Well Chad. This is the real me. Hope you like me."

_**You used to captivate me by your resonating light  
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind  
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me**_

_**These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase **_

Sonny stepped out of the closet a few minutes later once her tears had ceased. She slipped into a near bathroom, and washed her face so it didn't look like she had been crying. Once she was done, she went outside into the parking lot. The suns beams warmed her as she got into her car.

She looked at the studios and sighed. She was going to miss this place, but she couldn't lie anymore. It was not fair to them, and she hated the fact that they loved someone that didn't exist. Sonny took a shuddering breath, before putting the key in the ignition, and twisting it. The car came alive with a roar, and she pulled out of the parking lot for the last time. _**  
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me **_

"What? What do you mean she is gone?" demanded Chad, as he stared at the So Random! cast in front of him. Tawni looked at him, and a sorry expression crossed her features.

"She quit Chad. She is gone," she said quietly, putting a manicured hand on his shoulder. Chad wrenched away.

"No. I- she just can't- she can't- why did-she can't do that!" Chad stuttered, his face breaking down. Zora sniffled and the cast looked at her. She shook her head, and put a hand on her mouth. They ignored her.

Nico spoke up. "Dude, we know it hard. You loved her didn't you?" everyone went silent, waiting for the answer. Chad stared at him, dumbfounded.

Chads heart began to race. Did he love her? He did. Chad let out a gasp, and stumbled backwards, hitting the wall. He shook his head, and looked up at them, tears sparkling in his blue eyes.

"She left me."

_**I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along**_

Sonny sat on the plane, holding the phone in her hand. She was running away, and she knew that. She was running from her mother, and the cast, and Chad.

That was the hardest part, she realized, as the plane began to rise into the air, and she was told to put her phone away. The hardest part was to realize that she loved Chad, and that she never going to see him. Her nose crinkled and she rested her head on the uncomfortable seat. She was flying away. She was going to start over. She already had brown hair dye in her bag, and new makeup. She was going to heal herself, and become a totally new person. She had changed her name to Kasey Smiths and she was going to be happy.

Tears poured out of her eyes. She was crying a lot lately. The fact that she was leaving, after years of abuse was so strange to her. Her mother loved her. She _loved_ her. She just had a bad temper. But she knew that no matter who she told they would not agree with her, so she had to leave. She had to get rid of the past, and start a new future. She had to start over, or nothing would be right.

Her father had called her before she got on the plane. She told him what she was doing, and they both cried.

"I'm so proud of you Allison," he had said, his voice crackling.

"I love you Daddy. Take care of mom for me," she had replied, before hanging up, and boarding flught 87 to New York.  
Her new life was beginning, and no matter how painful or scary it was, Kasey Smiths was ready.

_**When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have all of me, me, me  
**_

**Hi! Okay so I figure some people may be confused about this, but... I hope you like it anyways. Trust me, things are about to get real interesting, real fast. Thanks for reviewing! Love you all!**


	4. I Try

**Hey guys! Sorry for the delay! Thanks so much for the reviews, they are so nice and they really keep me going. Its just been a really long few weeks since I just moved. Hope you all understand. The song for this chappy is I Try by Macy Gray. Enjoy! Love you all!**

_**Games, changes and fears  
When will they go from here  
When will they stop  
I believe that fate has brought us here  
And we should be together  
But we're not **_

Sonny walked down the street, face down, hat tucked over her black hair, which fell gracefully over her shoulders in pretty waves. Her deep brown eyes emphasized by the makeup she used to never wear. Her legs long in the dark skinny jeans, her small stomach thinner in the flowing purple top, accentuated with a beautiful jade and silver necklace that matched her hat and green boots. She looked good.

The heels on her boots clicked on the sidewalk that was filled with more people than Sonny was used to. She had been here over a year, and still wasn't used to amount of rude people that lived in New York. Her danginling earrings made chiming sounds as the cold wind blew the hair from her carefully covered face.

For those who don't know Sonny, they would not look twice. But those who knew her most could tell in an instant that she was not okay. That something bad had happened, or something just had her very down in the dumps. And for those who knew her, they would be doing anything they could to help.

But Sonny wasn't with the ones who loved her the most. She was alone, in a place where half the time she still didn't know where she was, and still could not convince herself to go back.

Now, the people who know her situation, which no one does, would tell her she did the right thing by leaving.

But Sonny loved her mom. Of course she did. She was her own mother for Gods sake, how could she not love her? Sonny deserved those hits that she received. She practically asked for them daily. Sonny knew that she would let herself fall back into the abuse if she went back, so she couldn't. Each day it was harder to hide. And now that the bruises were gone, she thought maybe she would be happy.

She was wrong. Sonny had never felt more alone, and miserable than she did right now. Getting up everyday was a hassle. It felt a chore, then her actual life. Something she didn't want to do.

_**I play it off but I'm dreamin of you  
I'll keep my cool but I'm fiendin.  
I try to say goodbye and I choke  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not near **_

The only person who knew where she was was her father. He talked to her everyday, and once a month came to visit her. He knew that she was in pain. He sent her a check for four hundred dollars every week, and was doing everything he could to make her happy again. He wanted his Sonny to be sunny once more. That seemed impossible, Sonny thought, as she pushed her way down the street, stopping to cross the road with a group of people.

Sonny was alone, and there was nothing anyone could do to fix it.

If she wasn't in such a haze, she probably would have noticed the giant neon sign with the Mackenzie Falls crew, and So Random! On it, advertizing the live performance they were having in two days. And she would have had time to run.

_**Goodbye and I choke  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not near **_

Meanwhile, on a jet plane, Chad Dylan Cooper sat, fiddling with the rip in his jeans. Tawni Hart sat across from him, watching the depressed teen. She gave an exasperated sigh, and flopped backwards on the leather seat. Chad glanced at her.

"What?" he asked, no emotion in his voice.

"Get over yourself Pooper. She isn't coming back," Tawni said. She meant what she said, knew it was true. She just didn't tell him that everyday she waited for Sonny to bound into the room, hear the moo of her phone, the smile on her face. She didn't tell Chad that she wasn't over Sonny yet either.

Chad looked at her, as his eyes filled with unwanted tears. Tawni widened her eyes.  
"Are you crying?" she gasped, standing. Chad looked away, out the window. "Dear Lord," she muttered. She didn't say that she felt like crying too.

"Have a heart Tawni. She was your best friend too," Chad said, ice filled looked at her cheetah skirt , and played with the little bit of fringe. She couldn't tell Chad she was hurting. That wasn't who she was.

"When did depressed kids, obsessed with girls who aren't obsessed like you, become allowed on this plane?" she retorted, crossing her arms. Chad looked at her, his eyes full of hurt. He opened his mouth, and closed it.

_**I may appear to be free  
But I'm just a prisoner of your love  
I may seem alright and smile when you leave  
But my smiles are just a front  
I play it off but I'm dreamin of you  
I'll keep my cool but I'm fiendin **_

"The same time they let bitches like you on," he whispered, and cradled his head in his hands. Tawni heard the soft sobs come from him. She choked back her own tears. She had spent the last year being strong for everyone else, and she wasn't about to break for Pooper.

"I-" she didn't finish. He had heard the cracking, heart breaking sound in her voice. He saw the tears building in her baby blue eyes. Before he could react, heart wrenching sobs broke through Tawni. She slid to the floor, her small frame shaking violently. The other cast members looked up in surprise at their now fearless leader break. It was a sad sight.

Chad kneeled down, and took her in his arms. She pressed against him, sobbing into his chest.

"She left me," Tawni cried. "She promised she wouldn't when my parents died, and now she's gone!" Tawni screamed into his chest. Chad looked up in surprised. Her parents were dead? "She left me, she left me," her voice quieted as she sobbed, before she was reduced to sniffling, and not talking at all.

She fell asleep in Chads arms, dreaming of her parents, and Sonny's smile.

They landed in New York, everyone asleep. No one knew what they were about to walk in on, and how everything was going to change.

_**I try to say goodbye and I choke  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not near **_  
_**Here is my confession  
May I be your possesion  
Boy I need your touch  
Your love kisses and such  
**__**With all my might I try  
But this I can't deny **_

_**I try to say goodbye and I choke  
I try to walk away and I stumble  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
My world crumbles when you are not near**_

**So guys I am like SO honored beyond belief. You are all so nice, and sweet, and I feel so special getting all your reviews. Beasically... What I'm trying to say is that I love you guys! You mean the world to me, and more:D Thank you! Constructive feedback is welcomed, and starting next chapter, I will be doing shout outs! Thanks so much!  
**

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	5. Authors Note

**Hey guys I'm sorry to disappoint you with this not being an actual chapter but I have a few things to say:**

**I kind of broke my arm during cheerleading... Total accident but it's going to delay the typing this one thing took me long enough. Don't hate me!**

**Also, I'm having a bit of a brain block on what to write next. I'm not sure how I want to do it. If anyone has any suggestions then please feel free I'd love to hear them. **

**You are all so amazing, and I appreciate the reviews you've given me. I promise I'll try my best to write a chapter soon, but my arm just really hurts. Any ideas? Thanks a bunch! Love you all!**


	6. I'm Like A Bird

**Hey Guys! Oh-my-God! I'm back. I feel like I've just given up on this story, and I know you guys must hate me for it. I'm here now, to try my best to make it up to you, maybe with some drama? Well, this song is I'm Like A Bird, by Nelly Furtado. Enjoy!**

_**You're beautiful, that's for sure  
You'll never ever fade  
You're lovely but it's not for sure  
That I won't ever change  
And though my love is rare  
Though my love is true **_

**Sonny**

Sonny walked down the road, oblivious to the commotion going on around her. A latte was perched in her hand, steaming hot. She took an experimental sip, and closed her eyes. Vanilla goodness swished over her taste buds, and she let out a soft moan.

Opening her eyes, so she wouldn't fall, Sonny let herself be carried in the crowd across the street. Hundreds of people every. She still wasn't used to it. Though she lived in Hollywood, and there were paparazzi, she had never felt so claustrophobic.

Dancing along the edges of the crowd, Sonny threaded her way toward Times Square. She had heard of something going on there, but she still did not know what.

Sonny didn't know why, but it was like something was pulling her downtown. There was like an invisible force, urging her there. She needed to be there, and she didn't know why.

She was scared.

_**I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is  
(and baby all I need for you to know is)  
I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is , I don't know where my home is  
All I need for you to know is **_

Sonny felt tears stinging her eyes. She had been doing so much crying. When her father talked to her last night, and called her strong, Sonny had that weird feeling to laugh, even when you know it's not the time.

She wasn't brave. She was anything but. She ran away from her problems. She couldn't face them. She left her friends without a goodbye. She cried constantly.

_Weak,_ Sonny thought bitterly, as she got closer to the building crowds at Times Square.

Her heeled boots clicked on the pavement. She didn't like the sound. It made her seem loud, strong. As if.

She tugged her leather coat tighter to her body. A chill was spreading throughout her body, and she shivered involuntarily.

Finally she was there. She shoved her way in, having learned quickly that trying to be polite wasn't an option. She somehow made it to the front. She was in front of a giant stage. Lights streamed down, and the curtains were tightly closed. It was the sign that caught her attention.

The screaming red letters were like a slap in the face. She couldn't breathe.

**So Random!**

**Mackenzie Falls**

It was like her past was coming back to haunt her. Panic bubbled in her stomach, and she felt sick. She told the man beside her to move back.

"I think I'm going to be sick," she whispered, clutching her stomach. Marshall's voice rang out, loud and clear.

"Welcome everybody! In just a few minutes the So Random! Cast will come out, and make you laugh your socks off!"

_**Your faith in me brings me to tears  
Even after all these years  
And it pains me so much to tell  
That you don't know me that well  
And though my love is rare  
Though my love is true **_

Sonny felt another urge in her stomach. She had to see them, one last time before she ran again. She didn't know where she was running this time, but now that they would know where she was, she couldn't stay.

Sonny hurried to the side of the stage, but was blocked by a couple security guards.

"Let me in," she pleaded. They shook their heads, narrowing their beady eyes at her. She couldn't fight them. They were twice her size, and three times her muscle ratio. There were two of them, one of her.

"You have to!" she shouted, tears rolling down her porcelain cheeks. They looked at her, pitying her. "Please!" she screamed, slamming a hand on their chest. A hand caught her wrist, and she looked up. Marshall.

"Who do you think you are?" he demanded. The tears started all over again, and she threw her arms around his neck.

"Marshall," she sobbed. Finally his hands found her waist, and he pulled her to him.

"Sonny?" his voice was disbelieving. Sonny didn't blame him.

"Yes. Oh God, yes," she cried. He pulled back, and touched her darkened hair.

"So different," he murmured. Marshall grabbed her hand, and tugged her back, waving of the guards who were protesting.

"Where have you been?" he asked, looking back at her splotchy face. She let her eyes fall to the floor.

"Here."

"Why?" his voice was so soft, and sincere, that Sonny began to cry again.  
She heard heels coming, and fear bubbled in her. Sonny pulled her hand away, and backed up. Marshall shook his head at her, and grabbed her again. "Marshall?"

Tawni.

_**I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is  
(and baby all I need for you to know is)  
I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is , I don't know where my home is  
All I need for you to know is  
**_

Her best friend, Tawni Hart was coming, and she couldn't escape. She was frozen, paralyzed.  
"What's going on?" she called. Sonny could see her now. A green blouse, loose on her thin figure. Tight blue skinny jeans, and heels. Her blonde hair shone, and Coco Moco Coco lip gloss sparkled on her full lips. "Who's that?"

"Tawni," even Marshall was getting choked up. Sonny felt like she couldn't breathe. She would hate her, Sonny thought. She would never take her back. This was too much. A bad idea. Why had she done this? What was wrong with her?

"It's her," Marshall's voice was far away. She was still too far gone, lost in Tawni.

"Her? Who?" Tawni wwas directly in front of them now, eying Sonny. She still couldn't speak.

"Sonny," Marshall whispered, and let go of her hand. Tawni's eyes widened, and she stumbled backwards in surprise.  
"What?" her voice cut Sonny like a blade, "you're not serious? How dare you?" her eyes went cold. She was unforgiving.

_She hates you, _ the voice in her head was gleeful.

Then warm arms slammed around Sonny's neck. She was suffocating her. Sobs wracked throughout Tawni, and Sonny wondered just how much damage she had caused when she left.

"You're back. You're back," Tawni kept murmuring, pulling Sonny so close, that Sonny thought she would die.

"Ow-" Sonny choked out.

Tawni jumped back, and her blue eyes shimmered with tears. Then she slapped Sonny across the face, hard.

Memories flooded into Sonny. Her mom, hitting her, kicking her, cutting her. Hating her. A scream came out of Sonny, and she fell to her knees, crying. She didn't hear anything. She was stuck in her memories.

"_You were a mistake!"_

That one was one of the worst. Her mom had slapped her so hard, that Sonny had fallen. She kicked her ribs, and broke one. She screamed those hurtful words, and that was when Sonny finally began to hate herself.

_Never loved,_ the voice laughed.

"_You were never meant to be born!"_

Of course she wasn't. She wasn't good at anything. She left the people who loved her. She was stupid.

"_You're useless!"_

"_You're stupid!"_

"_You're ugly!"_

Hearing her mother's words were like knives piercing her skin. It was like she didn't know where she was anymore. She had no clue of her surroundings. She didn't even notice when Chad came in.

_Loner,_ the voice hissed.

_**It's not that I wanna say goodbye  
It's just that every time you try to tell me that you love me  
Each and every single day I know  
I'm going to have to eventually give you away  
And though my love is rare  
And though my love is true  
Hey I'm just scared  
That we may fall through **_

"Sonny!"

"What's wrong with her!"

"Is that Sonny?"

"Oh my God!"

"She's back."

The last one was the one that brought her back to reality. It was so soft, so pained. Her brown eyes popped open, her body relaxed. She looked around, disorientated. They fell on Chad, who was breathing heavily. He was holding her down, staring into her soul.

One hand was touching her cheek, probably bruised. For some reason, it made her smile. It was like she was back at home, and nothing had changed.

_Sick,_ the voice in her head whispered harshly.

"Sonny," Chad murmured.

"Chad?" she didn't even know she was speaking.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Then she felt his warm lips press to hers.

_**I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is  
(and baby all I need for you to know is)  
I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is , I don't know where my home is  
All I need for you to know is **_

_**I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is  
(and baby all I need for you to know is)  
I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away  
I don't know where my soul is , I don't know where my home is  
All I need for you to know is **_

**Wow, okay. I had to pull this story out, kicking and screaming. I feel like it's a far cry from perfect, but that's up to you. Sorry bout the cliff hanger. **

**Love you all!**

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